How To Get Swole
On October 26th, 2016 in How To
- Go to the gym 3-5 nights a week and watch an intense serial drama to both give you a boost of nervous energy and allow you to avoid eye contact with anyone else there.
- Eat foods high in protein after working out, like one of those fancy bars that you suspect are really just square cookies or potatoes, probably.
- Waffles? Breakfast is the most important meal so waffles are probably good to eat too.
- Roll your sleeves over your shoulder the moment the thermometer reads above 70 degrees.
- During your commute, wonder intensely when someone will notice you’ve been working out.
- Always scratch itches with the arm from the opposite side of the body so you can flex it while you do.
- Scratch imaginary itches, especially around your neck.
- Congrats, you are swole! Take time to remind yourself of the many health benefits of an active lifestyle in the mirror every morning, with your shirt off.