Woman face down on desk under a torrent of emails raining down on her.

Friday Roundup: E-MAIL

On December 16th, 2016 in Quibbles

Hey y’all. What’s the difference between Silicon Valley and Washington D.C.? One’s a group of profiteering millionaires and the other’s a group of profiteering billionaires. And neither one knows how email works.


Maybe the tech titans would be able to figure it out if instead of policing vague ideas of terror handed to you by the state… they policed an actual issue like abuse on their platforms…?

It wouldn’t be hard.

But, as ever, we are at their mercy.

Given how Amazon fires its employees for taking sick days and makes them live in the woods (probably not great for their health) I’d say we’re right on track for ending up in a YA novel.

Probably they were just having a hard time finding a good place to rent, what with Facebook promoting discriminatory housing practices.

At least someone is doing something right for once though, as Twitter is refusing government access to its databases.

So, once again we are reminded to trust no one and demand the truth.

Should get marginally easier since Facebook is finally starting to address fake news.

In politics we learned that the only thing worse than GOP winners are GOP losers.

We learned that FCC chairman and open internet advocate Tom Wheeler is stepping down.

Thanks to Federal Reserve chair Janet Yellen we learned what a chairman with a spine would actually do.

But even in his resignation we learn, that we should never put faith in SWM to defend us, as they are so often unaffected by the horrible policies a government might enact.

As for that orange rust stain on the driveway of America, I don’t want to talk about him this week. – Shut up I didn’t say we should avoid the problem because it’s difficult. There are still plenty of people talking about Nazis, go somewhere else this week.– Here are some good things about the importance of local government and activism instead.

Whatever faith you have or don’t, stick to the moral high ground.

Organize. A small group is not a powerless group.

Identity politics” is actually good and also a stupid name for “having thoughtful and uncomfortable conversations acknowledging that there are experiences that exist outside your own”. To be fair though, the latter isn’t that catchy.

Federalism and local government are also good. I hope you don’t only vote once a year and I encourage you to go beyond that and participate in your government year round not just one day thank you.

Or don’t, whatever. The planet is ruined anyway.
Climate change is the real war on Christmas.

Glaciers, giant ice mountains, are just up and collapsing.

And turns out Methane is also building up in our atmosphere. Hehahahahahae!

NASA is looking into it, though.

Gosh I’ll miss them when they inevitably get caught up in the warehouse fire that is the next administration. Remember to back up your data regularly.

As the year comes to a close, I am bound by a blood-stone pact, like every other person who shares their thoughts online, to pick the idea that encapsulates the previous year. Oxford’s word of the year was post-truth, Cambridge chose paranoid, and dictionary.com chose xenophobia. They are all wrong though, this year’s word was: E-MAILS.

I have joined The Corporate World this year and let me tell you: email is the worst. It is like constantly being pelted with little pebbles, or being woken up every time you’re about to hit REM sleep throughout the night so you never feel rested.

But, you know this already. There are a thousand screeds written on email. Email is pervasive in common culture, and email is bad.

What people forget when they expound the evils of constant connectivity, however, is to account for intended use. Email is not bad by design: email is bad because people do not know how use it.

They send me to-do lists spread out over 15 emails and two weeks.

They demand I treat it like an instant message service instead of a memo inbox.

They constantly copy the wrong people

They send me passwords without a second thought to security leaks.

The problem is not email, or television, or trashy books, or punk music, or gyrating hips. The kids are alright and the problem is our collective lack of personal responsibly. For our ineptitude and for our lack of self-control. In short, it is a great metaphor for both presidential candidates which have dominated the news cycle for the last 18 months.


Happy Holidays. I will see you in the new year, as I am taking some much needed time to myself. I hope you take some time for yourself too, if you can. Read a book; stare at a leaf; walk a dog. Any dog you find will do, it doesn’t have to be yours.

And don’t stress too much about gifts, they are going to love what you got them. And money is fine too, money can be thoughtful. But, so is just being there, that will be gift enough.