A four story building burning down.

Friday Roundup: Livin’ In A Corporate Gangsta’s Paradise

On December 2nd, 2016 in Quibbles

Hey y’all. There is so much to be angry about this week and so little time.

Like alpha posturing Silicon Valley Bros flexing through charity.

They are so concerned with control and consolidation of power, and yet they have no plan to tackle diversity. Their philanthropic plans could certainly be beta.

Their ads leave something to be desired, too. Annoying at best, ads on the internet have the advantage over TV in that they can, and do, spread malware.

But ad block is also run by dirtbags, so, I don’t know, never use the internet, I guess? One of the most beautiful things about existence is that all your options can be terrible and there is nothing you can do about it.

And if the malware doesn’t get you the government will, since the FBI is expanding its hacking authority.

Meanwhile, Uber, in true business fashion, is cutting out the middle man and just constantly spying on all your data for itself.

But you might want to hold off on uninstalling all your apps because AT&T announced they are the future. Modular, portal-accessed internet that looks exactly like cable for everyone because this is the year every semblance of progress we’ve written in the sand over the last twenty years just gets washed away.


Whatever. Fine. Let’s just set the Potomac on fire and let corporations make all our decisions for us. I don’t want free will anyway. It’s a burden. Kill independent media and spoon feed me Kevin James and Tim Allen sitcom cross-overs until I die from the sheer mediocrity of it all.

It’s the natural next step once that day old lobster paste scraped from the bottom of a trash can incorporates the White House as another businesses in his global network.

At least he’s keeping people who misuse E-MAIL out of government.

I’m glad people are adjusting to the reality of his lies. Because, if he is going to build a wall, that’s going to block water flow and then how is he going to drain the swamp? Not gonna happen is it?.  It really makes you think.

No, it’s better we accept his ineptitude and adjust accordingly. The dude is not even a good Andrew Jackson.

Maybe he’ll make a better Senator McCarthy.

He’ll have some good teammates, what with the Republicans finally in control of both branches and still looking for hostages.

The house did manage to get something done this week despite its best efforts, and has proposed healthcare reforms with the 21st Century Cures Act, aiming to speed up the sluggish FDA, which only manages to approve drugs faster than every other nation on the planet.

For some, though, the bar is still too high. As Kesselheim told Vox, “There are a lot of powerful financial interests that would like to see reduced hurdles toward getting their products on the market because it can be expensive to run tests to show that your product works.”

I know the burden of proof is inconvenient, but we can’t all just retweet Breitbart all day or where would we be?


Well a least we have a millionaire leader who I am sure will personally bail us out once all our coastal cities are ruined.

Here are some not terrible things:

Twitter said they would ban anyone who violated rules, even a POTUS. Please. Please do it. Please give me that small joy of knowing his tiny fingers will never again haunt my timeline.

Veterans stood with protesters at standing rock.

Universal income experiments begin again in Canada. Previous results included more maternity leave, more HS education, and zero downsides.

If that sounds too good to be true, Seattle’s results for its minimum wage increase are in and there is also no downside.

Amazing what a little help and compassion can do for people. Remember that, and try and always do what is right, and not what is practical.

Happy weekend. The week’s been a lot, but remember: no one else knows what they’re doing either and that’s okay.