A squirtle crying while stress eating.

Friday Roundup

On July 15th, 2016 in Quibbles

Hey, y’all. Did you start playing Pokémon Go this week too? It’s great, and fits in well with all my dating apps— I can view all the unevolved basics in my local area. And not catch a single one of them.

It took little more than a week to out do Twitter’s daily users, and also everyone else’s. Turn out it’s more fun to catch ‘em all than block ‘em all.

But, like any launch, it wasn’t without hitches:

It broke into everyone’s Gmail accounts. Maybe?

It might have just been Google mislabelling their permissions.

And some kids found a dead body while trying to catch Pokémon, which was the pitch they were trying to sell for the Stand by Me remake.

Even though it broke the internet this week, that’s probably okay because the internet is breaking capitalism.

It is bolstering democracy, though, as Hillary Clinton makes like a Celadon City gym leader and gets down to the grassroots.

Turns out we’ve all just been waiting for an excuse to talk to one another, and catching Pokémon is just pretty dang fun.

Unless you don’t live in the city, or you’re poor, or a woman or a POC.

I could go on, there is no dearth of think pieces on Pokemone go, but I won’t.

If Pokémon isn’t your thing maybe you’d prefer some Harry Potter / Hillary Clinton fanfic.

Or perhaps you’re more into sci-fi than fantasy, and would like some dystopian horrors, like police using bomb disarming robots… as bombs.

If you prefer something a little more dense, you can dig into the academic articles about how academia is a mental health hazard.

Someone call the CDC and shut grad school down. In fact, shut it all down, since science is broken.

If you’d rather some light reading, Lance Bass is going to host a gay Bachelor series.  Finally. It is so nice to get some representation and finally have some gay programming to not watch in order to feel smugly superior.

Happy Weekend. Please remember to be aware of your surroundings.